So baby Leo is our first baby. We got him after more than 2.5 years of being married, and that was what we planned (and Allah subhanahu wa taala helped us meet our plan).
Baby Leo will turn 5 months old on March 29th. I finished my maternity leave and got back to work on March 8th. And yes, it was a day full of Drama!
We leave baby Leo with my parents when we go to work.The first day was weird! I felt my feet heavy when we were about to leave. I kept looking back and even going back to kiss his cheeks and smell his hair, and when we took the elevator in our way to the car my eyes had tears. I could not say a word for some time fearing that I would cry. During the day I called my mom may be four times (my working day is from 8 AM to 2:30 PM until baby Leo is 6 months old :-)).
And the real drama occurred when I came back from work to my parents house! You don't want to see how I held Leo and hugged him and started to cry. Not just tears, no... I cried with voice... I gasped and wept! I felt horrible... I felt like the horrible mama who leaves her baby alone for the day and goes to work... my emotions were sooooo exaggerated that day...
The following days the mission became easier each day. I started to take into consideration that I am not leaving him with a baby sitter or in a day care center, but rather with grandma and grandpa! Who will love him and cherish him and care for him! I also started thinking how lucky I am for my organization allows me for a two hours maternity leave each day until my son is six months old. I also kept reminding myself that it is not my choice, and that both me and Papa Lion need to work to provide for our family. My emotions calmed down and became less dramatic. But I still feel sorry for my baby -and the babies of modern families in general- because I still need to leave him and go to work.
Now, our time is not easy. And I think that working or not working is not -in most of cases- a choice. At the same time, when a mom leaves her son and goes to work, regardless of how nice we try to make it feel, she will still miss many of his important development milestones. She might miss the first time he says (Mama). She might miss the first time he eats solids. She might hear from her family that her child has started grabbing his baby feet with his tiny hands. She might wait during her time with her child after work to see her baby showing his new development, while he might not be in the mood to show them. At a certain point, the baby will start understanding that his mama (or mama and papa, both) are leaving him and going to work, and will cry after them may be every morning. Some babies will even manage to show their moms that they are not happy being left at time of work; they might frown at her, cry in anger, or even ignore her and play and smile with all of the others. All of this is heart pinching. ALL OF IT!
And moms need to bear all of that although most of the time it is not their choice...
That's why we need to make it worth it!
If you are a working mama, do not leave your baby for a lousy performance in exchange. You are doing the sacrifice any way, make it for a good return. Work hard. Concentrate. Get promoted. Get appraisals. Be distinguished. Become known with your skills. Let every one look at you as an asset they cannot afford to lose. Increase your income.
One day, when your baby grows up and understands life, he/she will look at you with pride. He/she will not remember that they were left behind. No. They will just see your achievements, and thank you for the quality of life that you helped provide, and for the wide horizons you helped opening in front of them.
And most importantly, remember to renew your intention (neyyah) and dedicate it to please Allah subhanahu wa taala, when you work to establish a strong self-efficient family that will provide humanity with servants of Allah with a high quality and value.
